How to make new friends as an older adult

Knowing how to make friends as an adult is not simple, but it’s particularly important in older age to prevent loneliness. Having friends in later life and feeling part of a community has many benefits, including social participation.

Luckily, those who are positive about creating new friendships can use a variety of techniques to bring this goal to fruition. And once you’ve made one or two friends, your social circle is likely to grow further as your new acquaintances open up the possibility of meeting more people.

Why is social interaction important in older age?

Making friends when you are older is crucial for both mental and physical wellbeing. This is because it can help combat loneliness, reduce stress, maintain cognitive function and promote healthy behaviours, like being more active.

The need for a sense of belonging and purpose doesn’t lessen as a person ages, but factors like retirement and the loss of a spouse can mean it’s missing. Friendships can help to ensure the desire for these feelings is met.

Having friends in later life has the following benefits:

Reduces loneliness and depression

Friends help prevent feelings of isolation and can significantly improve an older person’s mood.

Cognitive stimulation

Social activities can help maintain brain function and slow down cognitive decline.

Improves physical health

People who socialise tend to have healthier habits, like regular exercise and a better diet.

Stress reduction

A supportive network of friends can reduce stress and help manage difficult situations when they occur.

Greater sense of purpose

Friends can provide a feeling of belonging and contribute to building a fulfilling life.

Increased life expectancy

Research points to strong social connections increasing the chances of living a longer life.

Why is it so hard to make friends as an older adult?

Trying to make friends as an older person can be difficult because there are fewer environments conducive to forming connections that you’ll naturally find yourself in. When you were younger, school, work or scenarios centred around children may have made forming friendships easier.

Different life experiences or a lack of shared values can also be a barrier to establishing new friendships in later life. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable and thinking outside the box, perhaps making intergenerational friends, can lead to big rewards, however.

What to look for in a new friend

Most of us can imagine what a good friend is like, but it’s worth identifying the characteristics when thinking about the best ways to meet new friends. New friends should:

• Share your interests
• Be good listeners
• Respect your time
• Care about your needs
• Be reliable
• Have a positive outlook on life
• Be open to new experiences
• Have a similar schedule to you, so you can meet up

Practical tips on how to meet new friends

Here are some top tips on how to make new friends when you are older:

• Sign up for groups to meet new friends - make sure these are based around activities you’re generally interested in yourself.
• Rekindle old friendships - this could be in person, over the phone or even online through platforms like Facebook.
• Volunteer - take advantage of opportunities to help a good cause and meet like-minded people at the same time.
• Taking up a new hobby - everything from exercise classes to learning a language or joining a knit and natter, can lead to new friendships.
• Make new friends using apps and social media - it’s how the younger generations are doing it, so why can’t older people take advantage of technology too?!
• Join a support group to meet like-minded people - because you’re not the only elderly person in this situation.
• Build friendships through learning and education - whether you’ve got a skill to share or want to pick one up yourself, this type of interaction can be particularly meaningful.
• Start a social group to make new friends - as you never know who else is looking for the same thing you are.